drink this: firefly vodka

one of the few good things to come out of the south, firefly vodka aka  sweet tea flavored vodka.  fantastic on the rocks, with a splash of water, or mixed with lemonade. this genius vodka comes in five delicious flavors: raspberry tea, peach tea, mint tea, lemon tea, and sweet tea bourbon. i was introduced to this dangerous vodka last summer on a road trip to charlottesville, va, where we partied in condos, swam at the gated-community’s pool, and ate their complimentary cookies.  i soon forgot about its existence (this may or may not be because i couldn’t remember drinking it in the first place), however, it was reintroduced to me last weekend. this could partly be the reason why my fellow capslockers and i did not completely make it to the warehouse show. be warned: it is dangerous and delicious… just remember you are drinking vodka and it does have the same effects of vodka even if it does not taste like it. so please don’t make our same mistake and think it is wise to consume a bottle or more. cheers loves!

drink this: buckfast tonic wine.

Buckfast Tonic Wine, better known as Buckie, Commotion Lotion, or Wreck the Hoose Juice, apparently symbolizes Scotland’s national drinking problem. When I was in Scotland over the summer, I don’t remember anyone having a drinking problem. I thought Scotland had a weather/rad-accent/sick-style/excessive bagpiping problem. Related? Um, probably. Wiki says it’s the drink of those prone to “anti-social behavior.” I think it’s the drink of those prone to super-social behavior. Each bottle is 15% and contains enough caffeine to fill 8 cans of coke! That’s right little capslocks, it’s caffeinated wine! When you’re going down, it’s brings you right back up! According to my favorite paper, it’s causing riots in the streets! making out! “It’ll blow your head off!” said one Scott. But you know what he probably actually said? “It’ll blow your fookin’ head off!” Cheers.

drink this: tactical nuclear penguin

 a new beer has come out from my favorite brew company, brewdog brewery. you may remember them for their beloved punk ipa. but the two geniuses that started this brewery have now come up with the strongest beer in the world, the tactical nuclear penguin, which ranks in with an ABV of 35%. yes, 35!!!. this beer has apparently been “frozen by penguins for 3 weeks at an ice cream factory resulting in the world’s strongest ever beer (ever).” this crazy little beer even comes with a warning on the label that “it should be enjoyed in small servings and with an air of aristocratic nonchalance,” which is exactly the way we prefer to drink here at capslock. now i advise you all to go out and get your hands on one of these and experience all that it has to offer. cheers loves.

drink this: fireball cinnamon whisky

Fireball Cinnamon Whisky provides a spicy punch in the face in the best way possible. This hot drink was invented in Canada as a cure for the bone-chilling cold. And oh what a success it was. Shots go down smooth and leave one tasting cinnamon and feeling fast-spreading warmth from throat to toes. Perfect on its own or mix it with apple cider for a drink guaranteed to make those dreary fall days a little less bleak. Let this spicy drink light your fire. Cheers!

drink this: southern tier’s pumking imperial pumpkin ale

 

It’s the halloween weekend, and I know everyone is excited about the costume parties, masquerade balls, bar crawls, haunted penitentiaries, pumpkin patches, and trick-or-treating. I, however, am excited about all the drinks to be consumed in my slutty pigeon costume. It is the perfect weekend to crack open your favorite seasonal ale, or test a new one. I by far prefer southern tier’s pumking imperial pumpkin ale. It tastes like a pumpkin pie, which most cannot resist (and if you can, we probably are not friends). It has the perfect blend  of nutmeg, pumpkin, ginger, cinnamon, barely, and hops of course. Who knew this concoction could be so lethal, for with one sip you will be addicted to southern tier’s pumking imperial pumpkin ale. Enjoy the halloween weekend with your ale in tow. Cheers loves!

drink this: punk ipa

“This is not a lowest common denominator beer. This is an aggressive beer. We don’t care if you don’t like it. We do not merely aspire to the proclaimed heady heights of conformity through neutrality and blandness. It is quite doubtful that you have the taste or sophistication to appreciate the depth, character and quality of this premium craft brewed beer. You probably don’t even care that this rebellious little beer contains no preservatives or additives and uses only the finest fresh natural ingredients. Just go back to drinking your mass marketed, bland, cheaply made watered down lager, and close the door behind you.”

With such a bold label and a bitter bite, this has become my beer of choice. And I am a firm believer that “mass marketed, bland, cheaply made watered down lager” should remain on the pong tables of the salmon-pant-wearing-types. While those with “taste or sophistication” should join Martin and James and drink “some hardcore beer.” Cheers.